things the chuck we know wishes he could do

If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay's potato chip.
Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.
Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11.... a suicide.
The opening scene of the movie "Saving Private Ryan" is loosely based on games of dodgeball Chuck Norris played in second grade.
Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.
Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

this is for kens french self
When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.



Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.
Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.
The 1972 Miami Dolphins lost one game, it was an exhibition game vs. Chuck Norris and three seven year old girls. Chuck Norris won with a roundhouse-kick to the face in overtime.
Mr. T pities the fool. Chuck Norris rips the fool's head off.
Chuck Norris actually built the stairway to heaven.
Chuck Norris invented all 32 letters of the alphabet.
Chuck Norris can jump-start a car using jumper cables attached to his nipples.

i voted all 3.

Chuck and I both know that Jack Bauer from 24 would beat Chuck Norris's ass hands down any day of the week.

I saw 24 last night it was hot

okay dizzy im going to let that comment slide. i know you would take back thaT COMMENT IF YOU WERE IN YOURE NORMAL STATE of mind but i guess not considering you want to start playing WOW